Motherhood is full of sweet moments. A baby’s first giggle. An big brother’s kiss to his new sibling. A preschooler’s proud face as he presents you with his scribbled artwork.
I knew Saturday evening would be a sweet moment. It was going to be the last time I nursed Little Roo. He’s 13 months and I was barely producing enough milk anyway. I was ready to let go and he seemed ready, too.
But it was the moment afterwards that warmed my soul in a way I could never describe.
When he finished, I stood up from the rocker and placed his drowsy head on my shoulder. I needed to savor this moment as long as possible. In the darkness, we swayed back and forth as I reminisced at how big he’s grown.
Then I started to cry.
Little Roo loves to babble. Even at night you’ll sometimes hear sing-song hums coming from his room. As I cried, he hummed his little “words” through his pacifier. It was like listening to an opera singer. I didn’t know what he hummed… yet I knew what it meant. He was consoling ME.
The crying continued. Tears streaked my face.
He lifted his head and looked me straight in the eyes. The darkness swelled around us as the whole world spun away. It was just us two, enjoying a tender moment.
With a soothing hum, he raised his finger to my eye and ever-so-gently touched my damp eyelashes.
Even in the darkness, this beautiful little boy knew my sadness. He knew exactly what his melodic hums meant. He knew just by my muffled sobs that I tears filled my eyes. He knew his momma cried for a part of his infancy that we’d never share again.
Instantly we connected in a way that rattled my core. How can this little soul know so much about complex human emotions?
My little boy consoled me and it set him at peace. As he drifted off to sleep, I gently floated him down to his crib.
And smiled at the pure moment we just shared between mother and son, untainted by words.